Funny Jokes

Two women talk. One of them says: – You know, I have cheated a taxi driver yesterday!! Another asks: – How did you do this? The women replies: – I paid, but I didn’t sit in.

A blonde is watching the news with her husband when the newscaster says, “Six Brazilian men die in a skydiving accident.” The blonde starts crying to her husband, sobbing, “That’s horrible!” Confused, he replies, “Yes Dear, it is sad, but they were skydiving, and there is always that risk involved.” After a few minutes, the … Read more

A woman has to go to Italy for a conference, so her husband drives her to the airport. “Thank you, honey”, she says. “What would you like me to bring back for you?” He laughs and says, “An Italian girl!” When the conference is over, he meets her at the airport and asks, “So, honey, … Read more

My wife had some tattoos done on the cheeks of her Back. She said to the tattooist I would like a butterfly on each cheek. Tattooist says, sorry I can’t do butterflies, I can do Bee’s though. So my wife said okay they are nice as well. She came home, dropped her p@nts turned round … Read more

On a trip from LA to NY, a blonde and a lawyer are seated next to one another. If she’d like to participate in a lighthearted game, the attorney asks. The blonde politely declines and rolls over to the window to take a sleep since she is simply exhausted. The attorney insists, saying that the … Read more

The doctor and his wife were playing golf at the club and she Drove a 300 yard tee shot straight down the fairway. The doctor said Wow I have never seen you play this well before! Marie says, I took lessons. A couple of days later on the tennis court in mixed doubles, she smashes … Read more

Recruits got a shock when their Army basic-training instructor turned out to be an attractive female sergeant. Her assistant, however, was a burly, hawk-nosed veteran whose glare could freeze water. At the end of training, the attractive instructor congratulated the recruits and said that if there was anything she could do for us, just ask. … Read more

Two sperm swimming side by side were having a conversation. One sperm asked the other ‘‘how far till we reach the fallopian tubes?’’ The other replied, ‘‘Not sure but we just passed the esophagus.’’

A nun, badly needing to use to the restroom, walked into a local Hooters. The place was hopping with music and loud conversation and every once in a while ‘the lights would turn off.’ Each time the lights would go out, the place would erupt into cheers. However, when the revelers saw the nun,the room … Read more

A husband suspected his wife was cheating on him. He explained his situation to a pet shop owner who replied, “I have a parrot that will let you know daily what goes on in your house. The bird has no legs, so he holds onto his perch with his pen!s.” Reluctantly, the husband brought the … Read more